One of my horsemanship mentors along the way talked about “a million transitions” as they extolled the power of transitions to make everything better. I was reminded of this yesterday. First, in our lesson with Stephanie Jennings and again later in the day as one of my long term clients transitioned to a new adventure which meant ending our work together.
I have watched Justin grow with Kola and have been there with him as he has struggled at times to find the best path forward. While their path forward has not always been seamless and smooth, I know that Justin has been driven by a deep and abiding love for this horse. While Justin worked on walk-trot transitions in order to help Kola’s canter departs, it got me thinking how the relationship seems to be the secret ingredient that makes transitions powerful.
Yesterday afternoon I said “good-bye for now” to a client of 13 years. I care deeply for my clients. Yes, even love them. It is who I am and I would not have it any other way. It is only by finding the courage to love that I find the strength to truly care for my clients. At times, this means sharing an uncomfortable “truth.” At other times, it means creating and/or holding space for them to struggle, explore, grow, and choose their path. At times, it means letting them go. And, it always means putting their needs in front of my own.
The nature of my role as a psychologist inevitably leads to transitions in my relationships with my clients. Whether that relationship is a few sessions or a few months or many years, when it ends I always experience a complex and rich mix of feelings. From joy, pride, and excitement at my clients growth and accomplishments; to frustration when they make choices that I see may lead to more pain; to a genuine sense of loss when they spread their wings and fly on their own. I feel it all. It is simply and profoundly human that when we love, we feel deeply.
While our horses are not human, we are. As we enter into relationships with our horses, it seems to work out best when we enter those relationships with deep caring and love. Not the cloying, grasping, self-serving kind of love that is about making ourselves feel good. Rather, the kind of love that demands courage. Love that honors, respects, and seeks the best for those we love.
Watching Justin with Kola grow together is a powerful inspiration for me. It is a reminder every day of what is possible when one commits to loving courageously. I am inspired to continued my pursuit of this kind of love with my clients and my horses. I know this will make my life and the life of others richer and all the transitions better. ~ Paul
One of my horsemanship mentors along the way talked about “a million transitions” as they extolled the power of transitions to make everything better. I was reminded of this yesterday. First, in our lesson with Stephanie Jennings and again later in the day as one of my long term clients transitioned to a new adventure which meant ending our work together.
I have watched Justin grow with Kola and have been there with him as he has struggled at times to find the best path forward. While their path forward has not always been seamless and smooth, I know that Justin has been driven by a deep and abiding love for this horse. While Justin worked on walk-trot transitions in order to help Kola’s canter departs, it got me thinking how the relationship seems to be the secret ingredient that makes transitions powerful.
Yesterday afternoon I said “good-bye for now” to a client of 13 years. I care deeply for my clients. Yes, even love them. It is who I am and I would not have it any other way. It is only by finding the courage to love that I find the strength to truly care for my clients. At times, this means sharing an uncomfortable “truth.” At other times, it means creating and/or holding space for them to struggle, explore, grow, and choose their path. At times, it means letting them go. And, it always means putting their needs in front of my own.
The nature of my role as a psychologist inevitably leads to transitions in my relationships with my clients. Whether that relationship is a few sessions or a few months or many years, when it ends I always experience a complex and rich mix of feelings. From joy, pride, and excitement at my clients growth and accomplishments; to frustration when they make choices that I see may lead to more pain; to a genuine sense of loss when they spread their wings and fly on their own. I feel it all. It is simply and profoundly human that when we love, we feel deeply.
While our horses are not human, we are. As we enter into relationships with our horses, it seems to work out best when we enter those relationships with deep caring and love. Not the cloying, grasping, self-serving kind of love that is about making ourselves feel good. Rather, the kind of love that demands courage. Love that honors, respects, and seeks the best for those we love.
Watching Justin with Kola grow together is a powerful inspiration for me. It is a reminder every day of what is possible when one commits to loving courageously. I am inspired to continued my pursuit of this kind of love with my clients and my horses. I know this will make my life and the life of others richer and all the transitions better. ~ Paul
