Over the last several weeks life as been pretty busy. Of course there were the usual activities; client sessions, admin work, course development, horse development, household chores, and ballroom dancing, Then there were also a few extras. Justin and Tara got married and we hosted a delightful and relaxed rehearsal dinner for 75 people at our house (Thank you Sexi Mexi Burrito Truck). I travelled to Minnesota and Wisconsin to work with the USEA Area IV young riders and Woodloch Farm. Our AC crapped out at home. And, as I write, I am preparing to head out of town to see my other son Luke in Charlotte, NC.
As I compiled this list of things on my plate I am struck by the amazing mix of blessings, challenges, and opportunities. I realize that sometimes it is hard to tell which is which. Many of the challenges are legitimate blessings and each blessing brings with it opportunity and challenges. I often feel like I am in an enormous mixing bowl where my participation in the universe adds ingredients ranging from the essential to the exquisite to the outrageous.
Have you ever gone into the kitchen to whip something up for dinner? You can play it safe and pull out some packaged prepared food. You could grab a tried and true recipe and follow it to the letter. Or, if you are like me, you can whip something up, mixing in the ingredients you feel inspired to add. I can honestly say there are days that these creative meals are fabulous, days they are ok, and , if I am honest, every once in awhile they are inedible.
It strikes me that many riders experience their horse time in a similar way. When they look at things objectively they can see that their engagement with horses is a mix of blessings, opportunities, and challenges. In addition, most of the riders I work with experience a mix of emotions as well. They feel joy and elation at times. Fear and anxiety at other times. They experience optimism and hope, as well as pessimism and despair. Whatever the mix of feelings there is always a mix. There are times when this feels like an exciting recipe that results in a rich experience. There are times that it feels like a whirlpool threatening to suck them under.
There are many ways to approach this mixing bowl of experience and all the feelings it provokes in us. The simplest approach is to give it time. Whether you think of it like simmering a good soup that takes time to meld the favors or, you think of it in terms of energy and how all things are driven to a new balance or homeostasis, patience and time can often help us experience the richness of these hectic, challenging, and provocative periods of life.
There are also real situations in which we are in the whirlpool and not a mixing bowl. Approaching this with more patience merely threatens to pull us under. We need to approach these moments in a different way. I am reminded of a Popeye cartoon from my childhood where Popeye and Olive Oil are in a dingy, caught in a giant whirlpool. As expected, Popeye pops open a can of spinach and in one intense effort, he plunges the oars into the water and pulls against the flow of the water. The boat is launched out of the whirlpool and they are saved. I love this scene because it resonates with what I know it takes to exit out these “whirlpool” situations. It takes effort, resolve, courage, and a connection to all of our personal resourcefulness.
As I drive to NC today I am going to be reflecting on this. I know I am going to face many times in both my life and my horsemanship where I will be struggling to discern whether I am in a mixing bowl or a whirlpool. How do I know when the challenges I face are a recipe for growth and advancement and when I am facing a “whirlpool” from which I need to step back or step away? I would love to know how you discern the difference in your life with horses. ~ Paul
PC – Erin Gilmore Photography
