Lately, my mentors have been on my mind: Paul Kern, Micky Way, Brother Kevin Barry, Dr. Cliff Notarius, Dr. Rob Adamski, Dr. Pam Rudat, Ron Klein, and many others. I’m not sure why they keep surfacing in my thoughts and conversations, but I feel deeply grateful for the kind, generous, and talented people who have guided me. Each has touched my life in a meaningful and unique way.

Despite their differences, I can’t help but wonder what these remarkable individuals share. There must be something in how they view the world and connect with those around them. If I could identify and embrace that quality, I could share it with the people in my life: clients, family, and friends alike.

I’ve puzzled over this question until, like the Grinch, my “puzzler” was sore. Each time I reflect, I arrive at the same realization: in their presence, I felt deeply seen, valued, and, I dare say, loved. Another thought consistently emerges: somehow, I knew they believed in me.

Their belief wasn’t tied to my professional or material success, though they had confidence in my ability to achieve those. It was a deeper belief, harder to articulate. The closest I can come is that they believed in my potential to flourish, no matter the direction I took or the challenges I faced. They believed in my possibility.

As a therapist and mentor, I have the privilege and honor of holding that same possibility for my clients. With experience, I’ve grown more connected to this belief. Part of it is confidence in myself, but increasingly, it’s a quiet, deep, and powerful belief in my clients and their potential. In the face of their struggles, this belief anchors me, offering them a steady place to find stability as they navigate their challenges.

I see the same quality in Justin when he trains horses. As he has matured as a horseman, I notice his quiet, steadfast calm when a horse is struggling to understand or find safety. Justin deeply believes the horse will find its way, and he offers that belief through his grounded presence.

When we truly believe in the possibility of ourselves and others, whether horse or human, we open the door to profound connection. This belief lights a path through vulnerability, impatience, fear, and angst, bypassing aggression or harm toward ourselves and the world. This is the greatest gift my mentors gave me: the belief that it’s possible.

~ Paul

PC – Erin Gilmore Photography

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